Barking Mad

Joining a New Rank of Motherhood

"I am an American Airman.
I am a warrior.
I have answered my nation's call.

I am an American Airman.
My mission is to fly, fight, and win.
I am faithful to a proud heritage,
A tradition of honor,
And a legacy of valor.

I am an American Airman,
Guardian of freedom and justice,
My nation's sword and shield,
Its sentry and avenger.
I defend my country with my life.

I am an American Airman:
Wingman, leader, warrior.
I will never leave an airman behind,
I will never falter,

And I will not fail."

I am now the exuberantly proud mother of a United States Air Force Airman.

Megawatt is now a fully enlisted member of the military.

*deep breath*

I'm still letting this sink in...into every pore of my being.   My eldest daughter is now in the military.  I've been saying this over and over in my head all morning.  Saying it aloud in the car; getting the feel of it rolling off my tongue.  I'm letting the gravity of her decision fully sit upon my shoulders.  Despite all it entails I am flooded with an overwhelming sense of pride for this beautiful child of my womb; fully a woman now, who is about to stand tall and proud for her country.

I have a few months yet before she leaves for basic as she went in under the Delayed Entry Program... for that I am very glad as I'm not yet ready to see her fly off on her own.

This has been a decision we've been discussing with her for some time and something she has turned over in her mind for quite a while. She came to us shortly after 2nd semester began, this past year, and let us know she was considering the military as a means to help pay for school, in addition to the personal growth opportunities it offered.  Megawatt was faced with looking at almost $125K in student loan debt (and this is in addition to very generous scholarships and grants) after graduation, and she didn't want us to foot the bill for yet another year either.  Her bottom line was that she feels this is the right decision for her at this time in her life.

Megawatt's close friend Paul, and her boyfriend Kevin, accompanied me down to the MEP's (Military Entrance Processing) Station for her swearing in.

My gorgeous girl, words can not describe how full my heart is when I think of how much you've grown in this last year and how much you are about to grow and take on, in this new chapter of your life.

When the time comes, I'll embrace you and then watch you spread your wings and fly off, on behalf of your country.  Fly strong, fast, and with the knowledge that we love you. 

Be proud of yourself, Meaghan...you've already made me proud!

I love you!

 

Distracted

Big things are afoot at the Barking Mad Asylum, with one inmate in particular.  We've kept this pretty hush-hush for several reasons which I can go into, I hope, tomorrow once it's all said and done.  If you are family (um, hello Mommily) and know of which I speak, please don't mention it in the comments.  What I will say though is that tomorrow is an extremely momentous day for one inmate here at the asylum and whilst I have so many mixed feelings about this, I can't wait to share the news.

If all that didn't already have me befuddled enough, I'm sitting on the fence trying to decide about switching from my Sony DSLR to a Canon camera.  I have been on the fence about this for more than a year now and at one point was even caught flirting with Nikon.  I know this is pretty boring stuff to you, but I'm at a point with my photography where it's "Shit or get off the pot."  Pardon the offensive nature of that last sentence but it's completely apropos for where I am right now.  I'm not getting the kind of results I want from the Sony and I need to make a move.  I have considered moving up to their a900 but for what the body alone costs, I could get a comparable Canon with the lenses as well.  Don't get me wrong...I have loved being able to take some wonderful shots with Sony's first venture into the Prosumer DSLR line (which, technically speaking, was Minolta/Konika, as Sony bought them), but I want more speed, better quality and a higher level of support than I'm currently getting from Sony.

The thing about my photography?  I'm just not sure I'm good enough to warrant getting another camera.  Add to that, I don't Photoshop the hell out of everything.  I want what comes out of my camera to be genuine and beautiful.  I don't believe in embellishing photographs.  I know there's potential for a huge debate that could lead to argument in that sentence, but that is my opinion. I do believe in cleaning images up, but if the sky in the photo you took was not as cerulean blue as you want it/think it should be, I feel there's an element of dishonesty in Photoshopping it to appear as blue as you imagined it was.  Again, that's just my opinion. 

I'm at odds with this entire camera thing because I don't want to buy a new camera hoping that the problem with my photos is the camera itself and not the person behind it.  You can't buy talent...ya know?

Having said all that; I do love photography.  I love the sense of pride I get from uploading something I captured and having it come up as brightly and vividly as I remembered seeing it. I've been flattered to have photos from my Portland Headlight series be displayed at a local gallery - talk about a huge ego boost!  I love capturing the expressions of the Little Imp or Megawatt and her friends.  Live moments from life, forever held in time.  Unlike writing, which I don't have to work at and which is something that has been effortless almost my entire life, I do have to work at taking pictures.  I have to know my camera and the settings and then deal with all of those variables.  Every once in a while, the little knowledge of those things that I do possess, will come into play and the stars align and I get a shot I'm absolutely in love with. 

So what do I do next, amidst all the confusion over whether or not I actually have any talent behind the lens?  I slam you all with more photographs from Memorial Day out at Pemequid Beach.

We couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day and I'm grateful that despite a lack of talent behind the lens, for the gorgeous subjects I was blessed with, in front of it.

Notwithstanding how annoyed these two luvlies get with me being forever attached to my camera, you have to admit, they make perfect subjects...even when they aren't very cooperative! 

Of course, every once in a blue moon I can get them both to look my direction and smile!

We dragged Zach B., with us out there and I got him to smile for a few shots as well...

 

Well OK, maybe I should have made the above "smiles", singular!

 

Leave it to Megawatt and Zach to horse around.  I am never at a loss for things to shoot, with Megawatt and her friends in lens range...

Rock dancing? Um, yeah...leave it to Megawatt!

 

It was, after all, Memorial Day...

 

 

Oops!

 

 

 

In addition to the wildlife of the teenage variety, I was able to catch some of the "pesky and irritating" assortment as well!  Of course, the hubby, who this mosquito happened to land upon, was not thrilled with me wanting him to stand absolutely still so I could get a shot of the ugly little bastard!

 

The hubby would have preferred I stick to capturing this kind of wildlife...

 

 

...or even this kind, on the half-shell!

 

 

Yuck!  Sorry, but I don't like clams, dead or alive.

Of course, my favourite kind of wildlife is the home-grown kind! Running wild, hair flying everywhere, and smiling from ear to ear!

 

The Inmates Have Taken Over the Asylum

Champion Chowder...or, as the inmates are from New England, "Chowdah."

This is Megawatt and Paul coming at you live from the asylum. We just wanted to take this opportunity to share with you, the lovely readers, our delicious invention that is Champion Chowdah.

• Grill three onions and four potatoes (kick one potato into hallway for mom to find...see image below)
• Boil grilled veggies for approximately seven minutes 
• Throw in 10 pieces of already cooked bacon
• A whole stick of butter
• A decent amount pepper WITH whole pepper corns,
• A lot of Oregano
• Enough salt to cancel out the pepper
• Two cups of 1% milk,
• Three bags of three different cheeses
• And a dash of Mountain Dew.

Those are the makings of what we like to call Champion Chowdah. Oh yeah, none of this can be made on a kitchen stove, you have to *pioneer it like a champ…that’s why it’s called Champion Chowdah.

*That means you either have to cook it on your grill/BBQ or over a roaring bonfire if that's what it takes.

 ***Disclaimer***: If you are ready to gain 10 pounds of pure muscle instantly, Champion Chowdah is not for you. Also if you don’t want your ass to explode I highly recommend you NOT digest any Champion Chowdah. Basically if you’re not a champ/have no desire to become a champ, this is not for you.

Now I’m sure you’re asking yourselves, “How did these kids come up with something like that?”  To be honest we’re not sure…All we can tell you is to leave two 19 year olds home alone with a barbecue and I’m sure they’ll come up with a nice little treat of their own.

Megawatt and I thought we would share this life changing experience with you from two perspectives, the head chef (Megawatt) and the spectator/facilitator (Paul).  The spectator job was harder than it sounds. I had to make sure no harm befell the house…or us, as a result of harm befalling the house.  Megawatt's mom would have busted an entire can of "harm" on us had anything happened to her house, or her kitchen, which is why *pioneering the chowdah was important!

The head chef, me Megawatt, was out on a lovely day, sitting in a lawn chair looking at the BBQ. I mean it was a beautiful day so I decided I would pioneer the hell out of some onions. I then got the brilliant idea to boil them on the side burner. Then I remembered that onion soup was better out of a Lipton soup packet. I thought for a moment and looked at Paul and the idea came to my mind, potato soup! I grilled away because I needed to prove to Paul, the male figure here, that I, a woman, can grill. What better way to do it than with potatoes?

 

 I realized then that we had a great invention. Champion Chowdah.  After putting a stick of butter in the pot, Paul told me he would no longer “eat the effing onion soup”. Oh but he eventually did. He was a champion! I proceeded to add the rest of my ingredients in and let it bubble away on the grill. 

I dished up Paul, my mom, and me a huge bowl of chowdah each. My mom didn’t like it at all and I think there might even have been some gagging on her part, but Paul and I ate it and are therefore complete champions. My mom? Not so much.

There were only two things that came to mind for me, Paul the spectator, during the creation of this lovely dish. “I fucking HATE onions!” and “seriously Meg? A whole stick of butter?”

 

Paul trying to choke down some chowdah...

To conclude this post, we'd just like to say that the Champion Chowdah did not taste as good as it smelled.

Megawatt and Paul

Post Script: A Mother's Observations

Oh.My.God. 

So this is what they get up to when I'm not around. 

I walk into the house after a doctor's appointment to find a lone potato in the hallway (see above photo) and both kids out on the back deck (Paul is here so much that we are claiming him as a dependent on next years taxes...not that I mind or anything!), cooking a pot of "something" on the side burner of the grill.  Megawatt notices the perplexed expression on my face and says, "Oh hey mom!  We're cooking some chowdah out here and we're totally pioneering the shit out of it!"  To which I reply, "Yeah well, you know, we have a stove, electricity, hot and cold running water INSIDE the house?" 

Megawatt brushed off my questions and continued in her attempt to prove to Paul that Girls Can Grill.

Long story short...I give them both 5 stars for the effort and a big fat 0 for taste.  The only way I can describe it is to tell you that the potatoes were dreadfully undercooked and that the onions overpowered EVERYTHING.  Well OK, the taste of bonfire smoke overwhelmed everything, because that's exactly what their concoction tasted like...a bonfire!

Oddly enough, feeling the need to one-up each other again, the two of them set out to out "push up" the other. 

Geronimo coached each kiddo along...well OK, he annoyed the crap out of them, batting at their heads and trying to grab a nose here or there.

 

 

My arms hurt just watching all of this...

 

Resting afterward, Paul telling Megawatt that he was sure he out pushed her by 2...

 

I have no clue how many push ups each of them actually ended up doing.  I had dry heaves just watching them try to one-up each other.

A word to Paul and Megawatt...next time use one of the damn cookbooks!

BBQ's, Bonfires, and Bugspray...the Ingredients for a Perfect Memorial Day Weekend

This is yet another one of my posts where there are far more photos than words.  So sit back, make yourself comfortable and give the page some time to load.   I'll let most of the photos tell the story of our weekend.

Saturday Megawatt had a "Welcome Home" BBQ/bash for her friends coming home from college and a couple of her Navy friends about to deploy out of the area.   Among those deploying out this summer are Katie and Anthony; Katie (don't be shy, surf the asylum archives and get to know Katie and Anthony!)  is one of Megawatt's BFF's and Anthony is her hubby who serves in the US Navy.  Katie also attended St. Joe's this year and over the past two years has become like a daughter to me.  To say I am going to miss them is an understatement.  The Little Imp also adores Katie as you can plainly see...

Here are some of the other ingredients that went into making this weekend a blast!

A few friends, chillin' inside before everyone else gets here...



A certain kitten with a penchant for being where your feet are about to be - IN THE WAY!



Plenty of condiments for burgers and dogs!



Chips and dips...



Lots of corn on the cob...



...And lots and lots of these, simply because they are Michael Tekac's favourite thing on the planet (he's Megawatt's ex, and I still happen to adore him!) and he's about to deploy out to the hot, arid, desert of the middle east.

Toss in...

Megawatt's boyfriend, Kevin, helping string lights around the deck...



Food, friends, and song around a roaring bonfire...



...and more fun and songs...







...and a surly toddler who is bound and determined to NOT miss a single thing going on, especially after her mommy tells her it's time for a bath...



Once the fires have died down, you bring the ingredients inside. 

A little "male-bonding" time is important...





Toss in a female...







Of course, some of us prefer a story before bed...



A good time was had by all.  Full tummies, lots of laughs and memories. And for two certain furballs, enough snuggles and scritches and scratches behind the ears to send them both off to dreamland.

You know it's been a damn good weekend when you crawl into bed, utterly exhausted, but happy, and your hubby turns over to kiss you goodnight and he tells you, "Luv, you smell of wood fire and bug spray."  How's that for romance?

Finally, For Katie, here's the recipe you asked for.  It's super easy and as you can tell, it's hardly a recipe.

Asylum Salsa

Ingredients...

Olive oil
corn
black beans
good salsa
cilantro for garnish

It's as easy as 1,2,3! 







I always make sure, when I make this, that I brown the corn a little.



I tend to use a better quality salsa, Gringo being one of my favs.

Add everything together...



Garnish with cilantro (I forgot this time) and voila!

Tomorrow I'll post a bit more from Memorial Day itself.  We packed up the fam, dragged Zach B., (another of Megawatt's BFF's) with us and went out to Pemequid Beach.

The Eye Allergies Have Won

I'm probably going to regret this, but as I type this, I am preparing to remove my own eyeballs and then dip them in acid because at this point, it's the ONLY thing that's going to help lessen the itching.  Then I'm going to take a bottle brush and scratch the hell out of the inside of my eyelids.

Once that's done and over with, I'm going to go get myself a guide dog, a big huge furry guide dog (sadly, we no longer have Casey, but then, he would NOT have made a good guide dog. I would have been dragged all over the place, possibly into oncoming traffic!)  - because seriously, who wants to put eyeballs that have been dunked in acid, back in their head.  Then I'm going to get one of those red and white canes and annoy the shit out of everyone with them.  I might even beat a few people upside whatever body part it lands on, because I can.   I might very well end up becoming a bitchy old blind lady but I sure as hell won't have eyeballs that are irritating the crap out of me.  The hell with learning braille.  I'll just make those around me, read to me.  That's right hubby dearest...those asinine vampire romance books that you roll your eyes at, well guess what?  You're going to cuddle up next to me at night and read them to me.  Consider it foreplay.

However, because I sort of gag at the thought of removing my own eyeballs and because I woke up this morning looking like I've been kicked in the face, I am donning the biggest pair of sunglasses I can find and going to the doctor and begging her to "give me something, give me any damned thing you want, but please, MAKE THIS STOP!"  It's gotten to the point that Benedryl cocktails have replaced my evening Maraschino Lemonade (OMG talk about heaven in a glass) and I spend my evenings comatose from the Benedryl with a cool washcloth draped over my eyes.  And believe me, Benedryl mixed with Coke or 7-Up is nasty!  I just shoot that shit, straight, right out of that fancy little shot glass we picked up at Sea World a few years ago.  Sometimes though, when the hubby is being thoughtful and prepares my Benedryl for me, he puts a little cherry in the shot glass and adorns it with a colourful tiny umbrella. Every once in a while, he'll even chill the shot glass for me.  That right there is a sign of a man in love with his wife...um, or, sick to death of her wailing and bitching about her eyes. 

Once I get back from the doctor's office, I'm calling our tree guy and telling him to cut down every friggin tree and anything else that releases pollen, on our property....and anything that hangs over from our neighbours too!   I don't care about shade, I'll buy a beach umbrella.  And all the woodpeckers can find someone else to annoy the hell out of early in the morning with their incessant pecking. All the other wildlife that makes their homes in our trees will just have to find new accommodations, I'm putting them on notice!

Dear Pollen...this is war!  Consider this game on!